Community Means Knowing You’re Safe
A note about Pride
June is Pride Month—a time of celebration, yes, but also a time for reflection, courage, and awareness. For many, Pride is an expression of joy and identity. But for others, even those who are “out,” it can still feel risky. And that’s something those of us who feel safe in the world need to understand more clearly.
A friend of mine reminded me of that recently. We were chatting after a workout when he shared that he’d been feeling uncomfortable. A mutual friend—had made a joke about him being gay. It wasn’t said with malice. But my friend told me something that stayed with me: “Even though I feel safe here, I don’t know if everyone here is an ally. So when someone jokes like that, it makes me feel exposed.”
That landed hard for me.
Because I realized—he wasn’t questioning his identity, or his right to be himself. He was questioning whether the space around him was truly safe. And it reminded me that safety isn’t just about laws or policies or public declarations. It’s about the small, daily signals we send. It’s about whether people feel they belong without question.
Pride exists because not everyone feels that way yet.
And those of us who do feel secure—because of our race, gender identity, orientation, or social status—have a role to play. Not by speaking over others, but by listening. By understanding that what might feel like a harmless joke can land as something entirely different. By being thoughtful about how we show up in community—not just with our friends, but with everyone around them.
Pride is a celebration, but it’s also a call to awareness. And sometimes the most meaningful way to show support is to help create spaces where no one has to wonder if they’re safe.
Lisa, this is a very warm and thought-provoking post, a gentle yet truthful reminder to all of us to think before we speak. Our thoughts and speech enter a safety zone that belongs to someone, and eventually, it will happen to us with someone else's speech. What goes around comes around. Or, do unto others... if you prefer. Thank you for writing this; you're absolutely spot on.